Satan is bigger than I am and should I choose to fight him, I will lose.

Every day the battle within me is whether I should fight him or not.

Every day!

I get so tired….so, so tired.

You don’t understand!  Maybe you do!  But some days I just can’t stand it.

Satan wants badly to affect my days.  I think he laughs at my struggles.

He also knows what I have done in my life.  He knows of my lies; he knows of my cheating; he knows of the pain I have caused others.

He knows I can’t escape my past.  He knows it and wants it to be strong in my mind EVERY DAY.

Satan is bigger than I am

But God is even bigger.

I know this!

Satan, you can’t have me.

My God saved me from my past so I don’t have anything to escape from.

My God controls me.  I am His and He is mine!  Through Him I can accomplish anything!

My mind is His!

My heart is His.

GO TO HELL SATAN!

There will be days where you think you have me; when you smile cuz you think I am weak.

Yes, Satan, I am weak; I am broken, but you’re not just dealing with me.

Jesus Christ has my back and even as I sit, weak and broken, He is my strength.

Do you hear me Satan?

The same power that rose from the grave is in me!

I’m not the boy you used to toy with.

I’m not the lost soul that let you control his every thought.

I’m not that guy.

He is dead!

He went into the water and I came up.

New with the power of Christ within me.

Never again!

Dear God,

My heart is yours!  My mind is yours!  No one else will do.  There is no other place I want to go.  Fill me with Your Grace.  I need you!  Give me strength to NOT fight.  Give me the strength to say no, raise up my hands and let you fight for me.

Thank you Jesus!  Thank You for pulling me out of the depths of evil living.  Thank You for making me new.  Thank you for the awesome people you have put around me.  Thank you for covering my family with Your love.  Pull them closer to you Lord.  I pray their hearts are open to you.  I pray they come Home.

Lord, work in the hearts of those who come here.  Lord be with them all, but Lord, for those who come here and just read and leave…..Lord, they’re hurting.  I feel their pain.  I know it’s hard for them Lord.  Give them peace; give them comfort; weigh heavily on their hearts today Lord.  Bring them Home!

It’s in Your Son’s precious name I pray!

Amen!

I know you’re here!  You are why I write every day.  You are why I live. I know you’re lost.

I know how hard it is.  I know what it’s like to have a life you’re ashamed of.  I know what it’s like to cry every time you go to a church.  That sin will eat you alive until you give it to Him.  Accept Him into your heart.  Ask Him to forgive you.  LIVE with Him!

Life is so much better!  He will never let you go.

He loves you!  I love you!  And if you need help in your walk, you let me know.

Email me!  No more “I’ll start tomorrows”.  Today!

PEACE!

Today Gabriel gets home from school and we do his homework and then study his Bible verses for AWANA.(If you missed it, he IS quite impressive..see what I mean HERE…I’m not biased AT ALL!)  We go through the verses as usual, but he gets stuck on one.  Ephesians 2:8-9 has him stumped.  He just can’t get it.  I must have read this verse to him 50 times and it hit me!  I said OK God, I get the point…Kinda made me laugh, but I get it.  Boy, do I get it!

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.

There is nothing I did that saved me.  There is nothing I can do that will save me more.  Jesus did that….He did it for ALL of us.  All the school work and stress and fear and ability and failure in the world is not going to change that.  I am but a minor part of His plan, but I CAN….I CAN do whatever God chooses for me to do, but not because I’m any different than you or better or worse, but because of the Gift of God.  I just needed to remember why; Why I do this blog, why I go to school, why I LIVE!  This is not from yourselves!  Not from me, not for me, but for the glory of God!

Then I get home to an email in my Liberty University account.  I post this here to show you God at work, not to boast cuz I’m just an idiot in an average guy costume.  This is how God tells me to put my head down and get to work.  This is how He tells me I CAN!

Dear Toby,

Congratulations!

The final grades for the Fall 2008 term have been posted. I am pleased to inform you that your grades have qualified you for the Dean’s List. This honor is awarded to students who have earned a 3.5 GPA or greater this term.

It is a pleasure to take this opportunity to offer you my personal congratulations for your diligence and hard work. I trust that this accomplishment will set a precedent for a lifetime commitment to excellence in all aspects of your life.

May the Lord bless you as you continue to aim for His best in everything you do.

Sincerely,

Boyd C. Rist, Ph.D.

Provost/Vice President for Academic Affairs

I didn’t make very many “good lists” as a kid, so you understand my excitement .   God is AWESOME!  THIS is what my life is for!

How is God speaking to you lately?

Reflect!

We are 6 hours ahead of EST in the states.  I first said I was going to bed at 9pm and was gonna get up at 3 am, which would be 9pm in the states, to watch the votes come in.  I had been saying for months that I thought it would be over by then, but wanted to see for myself.  At 2am I finally made it to bed. I never get up when the alarm goes off; I usually hit the snooze button 134 times.  Not today!  I popped up at 6am and ran to the computer.  It was over like I thought it would be.  I’m not sure I truly believed what I had been saying until that moment though.

The first image I see on my screen, after the electoral map, is Jesse Jackson.  I’m not a big fan of Jesse, but to see him standing in the middle of a crowd, with tears streaming down his face, gave me just an inkling of what he must be feeling.  

I sat in tears from 6am to, well, it’s 9:45am and I’m still a little sniffly .  I have yet to see Obama’s speech, but from the blogesphere, I hear that I may be bawlin again soon.  Some thoughts:

I’m happy this morning, in a way that I have never been, for a group of people who I have little to no connection with.  I thought that, and my wife said, “you have something in common with them: we’re all Americans.”  Sounds simple, but that’s right.  Maybe more today then any day ever in my history.  We’re all on the same page…..literally.  We’ve said it for years, that we were making progress and I rolled my eyes as I watched all of the hate there is in this world.  Progress?  What is progress?  All it was to me, before today, was talk.  Today, I feel different.  Today, I FEEL the progress.  I have witnessed what my parents and grandparents probably never imagined.  

Are all of our problems solved?  Is racism finally dead?  Can we all rest now?  Of course not.  Nothing is that easy.  Listen, I don’t keep my political views a secret.  I may not run my mouth like I used to about the way I see things, but I’m not a hermit either.  I remember how I felt in 1992 and in 1996 and let me just say it does not compare to how I feel this morning.

I’m a white man.  I’ve never had many black friends.  I’m not a racist; never have been.  I am, like I imagine, most white men are.  We just don’t think much about it.  Maybe I’m naive to think that way, but racism doesn’t exist in my little world.  Although I cannot possibly feel what racism feels like to someone who has experienced it, TODAY I feel like I can understand how it feels to be part of something moving us away from racism.  Yes, this country has made great strides today and I will pray that we build on these strides in the near future, but this morning I cry with joy in my heart for African American families.  I have tears in my eyes for the black single mom, who for the first time in her life, this morning, will tell her kids, “see, you CAN be anything you want to be.”  I cry for the black grandmother who once worked in a cotton field, never imagining this day would ever come. I can’t get over the sense of pride I have right now.

As this is my first presidential election as a Christian; as a follower of Christ, I have to wonder how God is speaking to us now; how God has spoken to us in the past.  In this year, 40 years after Martin Luther King was killed, that number, 40, brings on a whole new significance to me.  Were the past 40 years like those of Moses and the Israelite’s 40 years in the wilderness?  What is called “40 Years of Probation by Trial”….Have we spent the past 40 years in a probation period, doing it our way, and now being a time of change and new beginnings?  Are the reigns of Saul, David and Solomon, all of which were 40 years, symbolic here and now?  Has it been biblically “raining” for 40 years, symbolic of the 40 days of rain with Noah?  Did it take that much rain to clean us up enough so we can see?  That number is in the Bible several more times then what I have mentioned. How, God, are you speaking to us? I will pray for clarity, but I KNOW our God is speaking. I will leave the interpretations to the people who get paid to make them, but for today and the days to come I’m a proud son of God, who happens to be an American.

On January 20th I can start to be critical and have thoughts about policies, but for today I have taken a step forward along side a nation of people an ocean away. May God bless the rest of our steps and when we slip and fear going in reverse, don’t turn around, don’t look down, look up, to Him and He will guide you.

I leave you today with some of Romans 13:1-3.  ”1-3Be a good citizen. All governments are under God. Insofar as there is peace and order, it’s God’s order. So live responsibly as a citizen. If you’re irresponsible to the state, then you’re irresponsible with God, and God will hold you responsible. Duly constituted authorities are only a threat if you’re trying to get by with something. Decent citizens should have nothing to fear.”

Thoughts, comments, feelings???

Now, I’m not a biblical scholar and I’m not very good at reciting Scripture, but I’m getting there.  Initially, I thought of a verse in Proverbs.  I don’t know the chapter and verse, but it basically reads, think about what you say before you say it and sometimes it’s better just to keep your mouth shut.  Again, obviously not a verbatim quote, but you get the point.  I had to sit here and think for a minute….”God, are you telling me to shut my mouth?”  Or is this the same ole crap where I feel something is so wrong, but choose not to speak out for fear of offending someone?  Well, I’m tired of keeping my mouth shut, but I will say up front…IAM IN NO WAY MEANING TO OFFEND ANYONE!

These issues; politics, homosexuality, supposed cults, etc.  They are the reason I can’t get too deeply involved in a church.  I just can’t read these things and then turn around, put a smile on and act as if I agree with it….act as if it doesn’t bother me.

Let me say that I don’t, in any way, argue what the Bible teaches.  It IS the Holy Word of God and that’s that!  BUT do we really need to be so much on the defensive.  Yes, protect your family, teach your children and keep yourself in line with Christ.  Go out and evangelize, plant the seed, but do not think so highly of yourself to think you can change everyone.  “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. Just love em man!  Have the same love for them, whoever “them” may be, as you do for anyone else.

Politics?

Personally, I don’t think politics has any business in a church.  The church is to bring us together, as one, in Christ and there is very little about politics that does anything but divide us.

Homosexuality?

Enough of the “you’re gonna burn”!  Dude, do you really think that’s helping anything?  Yes, I believe that lifestyle is wrong and is detested in the Bible and I think most homosexuals, deep down, know that also.  Instead of telling them how despicable they are and how they will suffer eternally, how about inviting them to church with you, teaching them the Word (again, planting the seed) and then….let God do the rest.  It’s not our job to change people…it’s our job to love people and I just get IRATE when I read or hear about people, claiming to be Christians, talking about all of this separation.

Oprah?

You have got to be kidding me!  Is Oprah now a matter of national security?  Is she starting a new church?  Does she preach?  Who give a rip?! Since when did Oprah become an authority on Christianity?  Oprah, kind of like homosexuals, has, I’m sure read some of the Bible.  She knows, somewhere within her being, that there is no mention of every religion leading to God.  I’m not going to get into what she says.  For one, because I don’t claim to know it all, but mostly because I DO NOT CARE!  She’s an entertainer and I used to watch her often and still do when it’s a show where she’s helping people.  Yes, she’s reaching millions of people, but those people aren’t stupid.  They’re, hopefully, kind of like me.  They see her as what she is and not as someone to worship.  Yes, I’ve seen the video where Oprah is associated with Obama, which must mean Obama is an “Oprah-bot”.  I can’t imagine where that video came from.  Can you?  You can call it a cult or a new religion or whatever you want.  I call it a TV show and I’ll leave it at that.  Again, like gays and politicians, I love Oprah too.

Finally, and only because this post is way too long, STOP preaching fear people!  This method of evangelizing was actually taught to me in an Evangelism 101 class.  Well, I think that’s a load of bull!  Just my opinion folks, but that’s the great thing about all of this…You don’t HAVE to agree with me.  You’ll not hear me trying to scare people to Christ.  I have spoken about hell and the nature of hell, but I would much rather talk to ya about the love of Christ and how His life exemplifies tons of sacrifices because of His love for us.  Have you taken a look at the life of Christ lately?  Did he scare Peter into following?  No, as much as Peter wanted to think he was all good in the eyes of the Lord, Jesus knew, and told Peter what he would eventually do.  Did He scream from the cross, “you’re all going to burn”?  No, it went something like “forgive them Father, for they know not what they do.”

Bottom line:  John 13:34  It all seems to come back to this for me.  Gay, straight, democrat, republican, and yes, even Oprah.  Love them all as He loves you!